In the year 1995 I left my job. I was 26 then. Decided to learn farming, buy a small piece of land and to lead a quiet peasant life in some corner of Andhra Pradesh.
I could locate this very nice couple Naren-Uma, who lived in Village Venkatramapuram, Chittoor District. They had some farm land. They let me stay in their house, fed me and allowed me to learn farming my own way.
Parents were a worried lot- they didn't know what was wrong with me, why I left job, why I was not married, why I was living in somebody's house and what I was going to do with my life!
And soon enough, by mid 1996 I found things going against my wishes: My own land was not coming, learning farming was going nowhere, land prices were rising, water table going down too much, my savings from job were too low, parents were pestering, peace was eluding... and most important, I began to see bleak future:
I went home, was in a lousy mood, was once again pestered by my mom, shouted her down and went walking.. aimlessly, some 10-12 kilometers, third time in three days.
As I roamed about in the Exhibition grounds in Nampally, I came across a small board that said "Vipassana International Meditation Center- City Office" and wondered what they were upto. And suddenly I remembered- the conversation I had (some three four years before!) with one of my good friends, Aparna Krishnan about how crazy some people could be like:
She was recounting her conversation with another friend of hers- Alpana, who had, some years previously, attended this funny meditation programme, conducted in a jail like environment. Alpana could not bear it anymore after the first three days, but those guys would not allow her to go! So she had had to actually scale a wall to escape! :)
"Those fellows feed you, for ten days, all for free! You will be shown a place to sleep, and thats all- no newspapers, no phone calls, no nothing- you will be totally cut off from rest of the world. They will ask you to sit, meditate." Aparna had said. I had asked her what meditation was. She said "They will teach you, probably". I had remarked "What if you kept your eyes closed and did something else- something different from what they asked you to teach?" and we both had a hearty laugh at that.
I can't tell you how pleasantly surprised I was to find 'these fellows' here, out of blue. Now I could escape from my pestering parents, questioning peers, get time to think through everything that was going terribly wrong.
I was lanky, with sunken eyes, funny haphazard beard, wearing loose pazamas and asked the guy sitting at the table, what the programe was. He (Prakash) was all courtesy - he said they have a ten day course starting the very next day- and there is vacancy there- and I could attend- ten days of silence, no news papers, no contact with outside world, will have to meditate for ten-twelve hours every day, and no fee!
I felt that is almost everything I wanted- except the meditation part may be- but "I can sit and think pending things through, while pretending meditation- no problem there..."
And Prakash asks me to fill the application- 'I am entering at my own free will blah blah..' and suddenly there is a column which says 'signature of the introducer-!'
"Well I am introduced by a girl who ran away from your course scaling a wall- I cannot obviously get her to sign my intro now. She lives in Delhi" I said.
Prakash was quite accommodating. "No problem" he said. "You can leave it blank. I will introduce you myself!"
How indebted I am to all these three- Aparna, Alpana and Prakash for giving me something that would become my mainstay for life!
And how surprised I am still, that myself, usually so very forgetful, could recollect in a flash such a very unimportant conversation that took place so long ago; and how blessed I am that chance took me to the very place where I was to see that triggering bill board!
So I filled the form, went home, and told my scared-to-hell Hindu-Brahmin parents that I was off for a ten day camp to this place of Buddhists- where I could not be disturbed- no phones, nothing- for ten full days! Then I slept the night through and set out in peace to VIMC on the outskirts of Hyderabad.
(.. to be continued)
I could locate this very nice couple Naren-Uma, who lived in Village Venkatramapuram, Chittoor District. They had some farm land. They let me stay in their house, fed me and allowed me to learn farming my own way.
Parents were a worried lot- they didn't know what was wrong with me, why I left job, why I was not married, why I was living in somebody's house and what I was going to do with my life!
And soon enough, by mid 1996 I found things going against my wishes: My own land was not coming, learning farming was going nowhere, land prices were rising, water table going down too much, my savings from job were too low, parents were pestering, peace was eluding... and most important, I began to see bleak future:
I went home, was in a lousy mood, was once again pestered by my mom, shouted her down and went walking.. aimlessly, some 10-12 kilometers, third time in three days.
As I roamed about in the Exhibition grounds in Nampally, I came across a small board that said "Vipassana International Meditation Center- City Office" and wondered what they were upto. And suddenly I remembered- the conversation I had (some three four years before!) with one of my good friends, Aparna Krishnan about how crazy some people could be like:
She was recounting her conversation with another friend of hers- Alpana, who had, some years previously, attended this funny meditation programme, conducted in a jail like environment. Alpana could not bear it anymore after the first three days, but those guys would not allow her to go! So she had had to actually scale a wall to escape! :)
"Those fellows feed you, for ten days, all for free! You will be shown a place to sleep, and thats all- no newspapers, no phone calls, no nothing- you will be totally cut off from rest of the world. They will ask you to sit, meditate." Aparna had said. I had asked her what meditation was. She said "They will teach you, probably". I had remarked "What if you kept your eyes closed and did something else- something different from what they asked you to teach?" and we both had a hearty laugh at that.
I can't tell you how pleasantly surprised I was to find 'these fellows' here, out of blue. Now I could escape from my pestering parents, questioning peers, get time to think through everything that was going terribly wrong.
I was lanky, with sunken eyes, funny haphazard beard, wearing loose pazamas and asked the guy sitting at the table, what the programe was. He (Prakash) was all courtesy - he said they have a ten day course starting the very next day- and there is vacancy there- and I could attend- ten days of silence, no news papers, no contact with outside world, will have to meditate for ten-twelve hours every day, and no fee!
I felt that is almost everything I wanted- except the meditation part may be- but "I can sit and think pending things through, while pretending meditation- no problem there..."
And Prakash asks me to fill the application- 'I am entering at my own free will blah blah..' and suddenly there is a column which says 'signature of the introducer-!'
"Well I am introduced by a girl who ran away from your course scaling a wall- I cannot obviously get her to sign my intro now. She lives in Delhi" I said.
Prakash was quite accommodating. "No problem" he said. "You can leave it blank. I will introduce you myself!"
How indebted I am to all these three- Aparna, Alpana and Prakash for giving me something that would become my mainstay for life!
And how surprised I am still, that myself, usually so very forgetful, could recollect in a flash such a very unimportant conversation that took place so long ago; and how blessed I am that chance took me to the very place where I was to see that triggering bill board!
So I filled the form, went home, and told my scared-to-hell Hindu-Brahmin parents that I was off for a ten day camp to this place of Buddhists- where I could not be disturbed- no phones, nothing- for ten full days! Then I slept the night through and set out in peace to VIMC on the outskirts of Hyderabad.
(.. to be continued)
